Clearing Out

After my last post, I set to work on creating a writing studio smack dab in the heart of my kitchen.  It's certainly not the most likely place to set up, yet it's where I'm most comfortable for now.

I've cleared off some of the clutter on Olivia's ledge and the shelving underneath.  I spent two days tackling "my desk", which is really half "the family desk" underneath cabinetry housing glassware and ceramics.

I found a basket which can hold my camera and notebooks, and with its handles I can carry it back and forth from the desk to the kitchen table, which I told you before is my writing spot.

The allure of clearing out spaces is that in the end you're supposed to feel better--lighter, freer, able to think more clearly.  All of this feels true in my co-opted space, yet I forgot about the possibility of the process being painful, about the clearing out being a confrontation of loss.

I left much of what I found of Aaron's in it's place.  I'm just not ready to move it.  But it's that tug of the not being able to that feels uncomfortable.  That shutting of the closet door you really don't want to look into today.

Despite this, I did feel like I could appreciate the beauty of my kitchen/studio this morning, and could move more mindfully about, picking up my camera, writing thoughts down. The goal to simply take a solid step towards treating my creative self, my writing self with more respect, was indeed accomplished.

I thought I'd share what else is being crafted right now in addition to words in my studio!  We'll have this Norwich Sourdough, made with my starter, and homemade goat cheese, plain and garden herb (rosemary, lemon thyme and lavender) tonight with a lentil soup.

*Creating a pin board gave me some ideas for now and some to dream on.  Take a look, if you'd like a little inspiration.